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Frazzled Mum? Why is it so hard to stop feeling frazzled?

by | Jan 9, 2017 | Busy Mums, From Chaos To Calm, Motherhood | 0 comments

Are you feeling frazzled?

I started a Facebook group some time back – The Chillout Zone for Frazzled Mums which is totally free to join and is a wonderfully supportive community. The rules are very simple – support and kindess not judgement or advice.  When you are feeling frazzled the last thing you need is someone criticising you. Frazzled is a very descriptive adjective, it means

extremely tired in a nervous or slightly worried way after a lot of mental or physical effort

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/frazzled

and is often used to describe parenting! Being a parent is tiring; from the early days of actual sleepless nights – (seriously if we adults wanted food every two hours we’d be called greedy)… through to the night terrors, the fifteenth reading of the Hungry Caterpillar and still she’s awake…the teething, the tantrums, the terrible twos that seem to last until they are 6 years old.

Those of us who magically forget all that as our children grow older, repeat the process and have more children so now we have sibling rivalry and love you- hate you to deal with.

“It gets easier when they go to school…” Who said that? It doesn’t get easier, it gets different. Yes, your house is blissfully silent for a period of time but now you may have to contend with several small persons visiting.

Frazzled mums want to be superheroes

The reason for all this is we so don’t want to let our kids down. We get frazzled because we are trying to juggle often conflicting priorities. Many parents have to work and feel guilty about it, but they don’t necessarily want or are able to stay at home with the children. In my opinion there is no right way to parent, only your family’s way. It is a totally personal decision for the family to make and it makes me sad to see other mums judging those that work or don’t work. That external judgement just adds another layer of feeling frazzled.

I recorded a video for you on this frazzled feeling…and I hope it will help to reduce that sensation and restore some calm.

Feeling Frazzled Can be Overcome

Your first step to reducing that frazzled feeling is to give yourself permission not to be perfect. Stop trying to be brilliant at everything in your life and take a deep breath. The sky will not fall in if you give your children a packed lunch that you bought from a supermarket as opposed to created yourself. It is not the end of the world if sometimes you say NO when asked to do yet one more thing you know will put pressure on you.

Your second step is to understand that you cannot take care of others if you are neglecting yourself. You will make yourself ill and then be no good to anyone. So, however small a step, build in some ME time for yourself, ideally each day (even 1 deep breath), but at a minimum, each week.

The third step is to ask for help and get support when you are feeling particularly frazzled and stressed. You can do that via my Facebook group which is a very supportive and positive community. However, if you want to finally replace those feelings of anxiety with calm, you need to develop the habit of pacing yourself and taking care of yourself. One of the ways I am offering to help with this is through my 30 day challenge to “Get My Sanity Back“.

This is completely free and is aimed at mums trying to get to grips with their own challenges; change their habits and create positive feelings for themselves and their family.  You have nothing to lose…so why not join me and hundreds of others in the challenge? It starts on February 1st and you can register HERE. I look forward to helping you make 2017 your most peaceful year yet.

If you are a mum who wants to have feel happier in herself, with her children check out my book Frazzled to Fabulous in 5 Minutes a Day Follow my quick and easy step-by-step programme here https://www.frazzledtofabulous.com/