The messages I unconsciously internalised from my background are that “Life’s not about having fun. It’s about survival, working hard and making ends meet”. So when my nine year old daughter told me I needed to be more fun, I was slightly taken a back. I heard myself repeating the mantras I’d absorbed. My child wanted a fun-filled mum and I didn’t know how to do that. I had fun when I was younger. Many people remember me for my silly laugh! But somehow, the responsibilities of being a mum and trying to jointly create a livelihood took the lightness and fun out of my life. I took my responsibilities seriously and had forgotten to laugh along the way. So I told her I was going to start being fun. Unfortunately, instead of being fun, I ‘tried’ to be fun, which is totally different, and failed miserably. Finally, it became apparent that if I couldn’t be fun in a genuine way, I needed to be authentic. I felt disappointed with myself that fun wasn’t something I could connect with easily.
One day, Peter – my husband and business partner – was on a train to London and as usual was meditating on something deep and meaningful – he asked the universe what the purpose of life was. The answer that came to him was to have fun. When he told me that I thought it was a but trivial and that my life purpose was much more serious than this!
A year or so later, as part of a business mastermind group run by Sejual Shah, we were encouraged to choose a word that represents what we want for our businesses in 2012. Still struggling with “fun”, I chose that theme to explore. Little did I realise that this choice would make 2012 the most fun year of my life to date!
Tamara and Peter Donn at the Olympics Opening Ceremony London 2012. I was part of the Green and Pleasant section while Peter was in the Industrial Revolution
In October 2011, Peter mentioned that he put our names down to participate in the Olympics Opening Ceremony. I didn’t take this piece of information seriously and conveniently forgot about it. So when we received an invitation to take part in an audition, I said I wasn’t interested. He reminded me that I had a secret fantasy to be a dancer and this could be my BIG opportunity. All I could think about was X-Factor and Britian’s Got Talent. I didn’t want to be exposed, humiliated or voted off! He kept telling me I had nothing to lose and to go along. Reluctantly, I agreed with him and set off one Autumnal day to the other side of London. Like hundreds of others, we got there hours too early and joined them in a cafe just outside Three Mills Film Studios in Bromley-By-Bow. All of them looked young, slim, fit and far more suited for dancing than me. I felt sick with fear. I felt out of place and wanted to get out of there. I left Peter in the cafe and went for a walk along the canal. I was close to tears and realised that the reason I couldn’t run away and go home was because I couldn’t face telling my daughter that I didn’t have the courage to go through with it. What sort of role model would that be!
Finally the time came when we could start queuing to enter the studios. After security checks we queued again for numbered labels to wear as identification, got measured for costumes, were photographed and finally entered the studio. Everyone was warm, friendly and fun and not a cameraman in sight. The audition was easy and fun, learning various dance routines as a group – no solos. I came home that night feeling excited, happy and proud that I hadn’t back out. Even if I didn’t get through, it really had been a fun experience.
A few weeks later, we both got another email saying we had got through to the next audition and, finally, in January, we got confirmation that we had been accepted to take part in the ceremony. As, unfortunately, I didn’t get a dance part, I wasn’t sure if wanted to participate but decided to see how it goes and I could always back out if I didn’t like it.
As it happens the whole Olympic event was for me one of the most powerful, FUN and exciting experiences that I will treasure forever. The peak moment was standing in the centre of the stadium, watching the countdown on the huge screens, hearing the crowds cheering or should I say roaring and realising that millions of people had come together in peace to share the moment of the start of the Olympic Games – and I was right there in the middle of it. I was one small part of making it happen. I was overcome with incredible joy, excitement and enormous pride in myself, in all the volunteers that had worked together to create this and in London for pulling off such an awesome event.
Green and Pleasant Land 2012 Olympics opening ceremony. I’m wearing a lilac dress, Can you spot me?
Incredibly, that feeling of fun has followed me from this event and into my life in so many ways and I am now bringing this sense of fun into all aspects of my life including my work, not at the expense of it’s serious aspects, but to create a harmonious balance.
If you were to ask my daughter whether I was fun to be with, you can be sure she would say yes!
My question to you is “How are you manifesting fun in your life?” and “What is stopping you from having fun/ more fun?”. For some it may be believing that they don’t deserve to have fun. Others may feel that they are too busy to have fun or maybe like me they absorbed messages from their past that life is hard work and not about having fun. My desire is to support you to experience more fun in your life. For more details see: www.transformationforwomen.co.uk
If you are a mum who wants to have feel happier in herself, with her children check out my book Frazzled to Fabulous in 5 Minutes a Day Follow my quick and easy step-by-step programme here https://www.frazzledtofabulous.com/