Since attending the inspiring I Can Do It conference with Hay House (see previous blog Loving Yourself at I Can Do It), I have been observing how much of my behaviour comes from a place of loving myself. Yesterday I was faced with two dilemmas. The first was that I had booked to attend a course but realised that I was overcommitted this week and when my husband, Peter, asked me
“If you truly loved yourself, what would you do?”
I realised that the reason I wanted to do the course was not to let the workshop facilitator down (who is my friend) and that if I loved myself I would not do it. With that realisation, I called my friend to let her know and she was very understanding!
Often a “should” implies a judgement which does not come from a place of self love although not always. The other dilemma I faced yesterday came when I needed to decide whether to rehearse for the show that I am in soon and need to practise or relax in front of the TV. The first option felt like a should but when I asked myself the same question “If I truly loved myself what would I do?”, the answer came immediately that I would practise first and then watch TV as that was the kind and compassionate thing to do so that I would know my part better and feel more confident.
When I see clients I listen to their language and what they say to themselves about themselves. Here are some statements that people say that may be familiar:
* I should have known better
* I was too weak to assert myself and I hate that about myself
* I’m a moody cow
* I hurt the person I love and that makes me a bad person so I can’t forgive myself
Humans have a whole range of emotions – some nice, some not. Acceptance of all feelings is loving but many people beat themselves up or judge themselves for the “wrong” feelings as in the example above “I hurt the person I love and that makes me a bad person”.
Next time you notice that you are saying a self punishing statement (as in the examples above) imagine that your best friend or your child had said that. The chances are that you would have more compassion towards them than you do towards yourself. I invite you to have that compassion towards yourself.
Next time when faced with a dilemma of which action to take, use EFT (download a FREE manual if you have not tried it yet) to move towards more self loving choices.
For example if faced with the choice of having a rest or getting on with the long to-do list in front of you when you are exhausted you would use the following EFT setup statement:
“Even though if I loved myself I would have a rest but I can’t because I’ve got too much to do, I deeply and completely love and accept myself”
EFT can increase the self love feeling by either releasing all the reasons why one feels one doesn’t love oneself or by increasing the self-love vibration. In the video below I will be showing you one way to increase self love using Positive EFT as created by Silvia Hartmann. So, while taking responsibility for your wellbeing, tap along with me.
If you are a mum who wants to have feel happier in herself, with her children check out my book Frazzled to Fabulous in 5 Minutes a Day Follow my quick and easy step-by-step programme here https://www.frazzledtofabulous.com/