EFT gets stuck when the SUDs (subjective units of distress) on a scale from 0 (lowest) to 10 (highest) does not reduce. Some people give up at this stage and blame their lack of improvement on the technique. But here are 5 powerful reasons (and of course there are lots more but these are my favourite!) why you might be sabotaging your own success with getting over the problem you are working on.
Five Reasons Why EFT Gets Stuck
1) I’d rather be right than happy
When someone has upset or hurt you and you feel angry about it, it can feel that your anger is justified (and in many cases it is). Being angry can give rise to feeling of wanting revenge and can feel justified given what they have done to you or what you have been through. But the anger is hurting you more than its hurting them. So in order to create emotional freedom, you will need to release the need to hold on to it and the need to be right It does not mean that what they did or what happened to you is OK and it does not mean that you forgive them. It just means that despite what you went through you can be at peace with yourself.
2) Being sad keeps me close to them
When a loved one dies, one of the blocks to regaining peace, is the belief that holding onto the sadness or grief keeps you close to them. Often there is fear that letting go of the sadness is disrespectful to the person who has died. What I have noticed with clients is that when they let go of the sadness, they have more access to the love and happy memories of their loved one that they can treasure in their heart.
3) I’m proud of the person I’ve become
When someone experiences a difficult childhood and has overcome trauma and difficult challenges, they build their personality and identity based on the strength cultivated as a result of their background.
For example, a child didn’t get into a grammar school and had to go to a comprehensive school, may create the belief that nothing is going to stop them from creating success. They may become overachievers, get into Oxford University, become a head of a company, and still not feel good enough. They may have a fear that if they let go of their past, they will let go of the success they have achieved. By releasing the childhood challenges, they let go of the limiting beliefs and become an even better version of themselves.
4) Who would I be without this
This is another version of the identity limitation in the previous point. It applies to when someone feels they have been through so much for so long that if they let it go by doing a few short rounds of EFT, it would mean that their suffering was in vein. The story that they have created about themselves and their past feels so true and justifiable that they can’t see another way.
For example, someone experiences chronic health anxiety because they witness a lot of sickness and death in their family. They live in constant fear about their own health and that of their children. Every though and decision they make will be based on if this can cause illness. They will try to protect themselves and their family. If they fear getting skin cancer, they may spend as little time as possible outside missing out on opportunities of connecting with nature or letting their children go camping. Etc. Letting go of this anxiety will mean that they would have to acknowledge that the
truth they build their whole life on is in fact their limiting belief. Releasing it through EFT, will give rise to a new freedom.
5) I need to keep this to protect me from getting hurt again
If someone has been harmed in the past, they may have created beliefs that keeping this thought, behaviour, physical issue, or emotion, is keeping them safe from getting hurt again.
For example, someone who has been through a nasty divorce may not let other potential partner into their heart as they fear being hurt again. By blocking other every potential suiter, they are not using accessing their intuition to support them in making better decisions. They may not trust their intuition which again can be blocking the possibility of them having a new relationship.
Use these reasons in your EFT practice
Now that you know the reason why you can’t move forward, build the reason into your EFT practise. For example, if you feel that you would rather be right than happy, here is a tapping script example:
Side of hand: Even though I will never let them off the hook, I accept myself and how I feel
Even though what they did is wrong and it always will be, I acknowledge how I feel about it
Even though I can’t accept it, its in the past, that was then and this is now, and I am OK now
Top of head: I will never let them off the hook
Eyebrow: What they did is wrong
Side of eye: I can’t accept it
Under eye: All of this anger
Under nose: I can feel it in my body
Chin: I want to punish them
Under arm: And all this anger is punishing me
Top of head: And its punishing by body
Eyebrow: And I want to be free of this horrible feeling
Side of eye: That’s been with me for all this time
Under eye: What they did will never be OK
Under nose: But what if I could feel better than I do right now
Chin: So that I can be free of this
Under arm: I deserve to have some peace about this
Top of head: I choose to feel more peaceful than this
Eyebrow: I choose to know that what happened is on OK
Side of eye: I choose to know that it will never be OK
Under eye: I have been carrying this as a burden for a long time
Under nose: And I choose to let (some of this) go now
Chin: So that I can be free of this
Under arm: Letting go…
Centre of chest:Transform